In my former life as a sportsman, I had a number of injuries. Both ankles. Rectus femuris. Both thumbs. Lower back. Both shoulders. Out of all my injuries, I managed to never break a bone. Until last night. I broke my toe. The little one. On my left foot. I haven’t been to a doctor, but I’m confident this is more than a stubbed toe! I think I can deal with it. I’m pretty tough. The thing I can’t deal with is how I broke the toe.
Was I viciously tackled from behind by a South American while playing football? No. Did I fall off my bike while riding in the picturesque French Alps? No. Were my calculations slightly out when dropping into a 90ft half-pipe on my skateboard? No.
I broke my toe writing an essay.
Embarrassing. I know. Yep. My first broken bone is from an academic injury. How the heck can you break a toe writing an essay? Let me explain.
At Moore College, we have electronic submission for essays. They need to be uploaded by 11:55pm on the due date. I normally submit mine between 11:47 and 11:54pm. Last night, I was on track for another “comfortable” submission.
The wireless Internet isn’t working on my computer at the moment. So at 11:51pm I picked up my computer to plug it into the modem in the kitchen. Plenty of time, no stress.
But the Internet wasn’t working. Losing time, stress. Clock ticking. So I plugged in my phone to tether the Internet, but it wasn’t working either. 11:52pm. Then I thought that maybe I needed to plug the computer into the power socket to get the network cable to work. 11:53pm. I began my sock lined run across our polished floor boards. Bang. Crash. Crack. Smash. As I slipped, I collected the wall, filing cabinet and futon. Ouch. My arm. My bottom. My back. My little left toe. I got the power cord and jogged back to the kitchen. 1154pm.
By this stage, Rowena had been woken up the bang-crash-cracking-smash.
“Dave, are you alright? I thought you were getting beaten up by an intruder!?”
“No. I’ll be fine. I’m just getting beaten up by this essay!”
The power cord didn’t work.
11:55pm.
So we tried to transfer it to Row’s computer. Except my computer wasn’t recognising the USB key.
11:56pm. It was too late.
I tried to re-start my computer. It crashed. It’s a PC, so it took 15 minutes to sort itself out. By 12:14am, it was submitted. Yay. But late. Un-yay.
Ice. Sleep. Limp.
I’ll probably spend an hour or two today tightening up the essay, to make up for the marks I’ll lose.
Any medical people out there? Should I see a doctor? They can’t really do anything anyway?
Any fashion police out there? I’m sorry. Today I’m breaking your number 1 rule: I’m wearing jeans and running shoes.
Any Dell or Windows computer people out there? I don’t blame you. You can only cut it fine so many times before something like this happens!
Anyone still reading this far? Thanks. If someone asks you how I broke my little toe, tell them I broke it wrestling a lion.
Any lame injury stories waiting to be told???
love it… best essay experience ever :)
love it… just read ‘izaac thinks aloud’ post about the 11.55pm deadline and just failing to meet it. Read next post, yours… 11.55pm deadline and just failing to meet it. How many other 11.55pm stories are out there???
Hope the little toe is ok big man.
Great story Dave, Ive broken my right little toe 3 times.
First, on a door frame chasing my sister around the house (I was 12)
Second, playing NFL on the sand at Copa
Thirdly, 2 months ago, I booted the lounge.
I know how you feel, i have a very mangled little toe.
get a mac…love matt.
I sympathise! I broke my second toe at the beginning of the year, whilst on the computer… sitting on a bar stool, on computer, foot resting on the wooden rail at the bottom of the stool, it slipped, and at a strong fast rate, went flying forward (just my foot) and bang into the big box (old daggy computer) that was right near my foot… sore, black toe for way too long.
Currently suuffering from a sprained ankle from stepping off out back deck onto the ground, having just recovered from putting my back out doing my son’s shoe laces and 4 stitches in my head from a fin chop whilst surfing in calm, knee deep water at Umina… I feel like the queen of crazy injuries this year :-)
@ tessa – :)
@ steve – thanks for the heads up on izaac’s story!! (i haven’t checked my blog reader for the last month… so i’d missed it). there are lots of 11:55pm stories out there… half the year push the 1155 deadline, a quarter are probably late, and the other quarter finish them the day after we get given the question!
@ tim – trifecta of broken toes!!!
@ matt – if you’re shouting!
@ glenys – you definitely win the crown for queen of crazy injuries this year!!
Oh my. I googled “How to write an essay about a broken toe” and found you. I am a writer. Two years I broke my left fifth toe for the first time. Nine months ago the second. Tripped over a computer cable twice, both times after clicking ‘send’ to pay my bills online. Two surgeries have eaten up my life and changed my self image. I have written many other things in this time but have not been able to put together an essay about this experience. You made me laugh. I will attempt to write an essay-tomorrow. So many funny experiences during my two years,why not? But you MUST see a Dr. She will certainly put you in an air cast (I would like to buy stock in the company that makes them) and when you are not wearing it elevate and ice your foot. Do not put any weight on the foot even when the cast is on. My first Dr. forgot actually forgot to tell me about the weight bearing part. Six months and 12 x-rays later he remembered. And said he was so sorry. Please take care of this. If you can send me some encouragement (about the writing) I can use it . It’s great I found your website.
anita,
love it!!
have you finished your writing yet?
when you do, shoot me a copy.
looking forward to reading it.
Thank you!